The 10 People You Will Meet in College

College Graduation












You’ve done it,  you’ve made it  into college. A place where over the next four years you will learn about partying, sex, drugs and …whatever you decide to major in…but back to the important stuff. College is the place where you step out of your bubble and meet new people. I can almost guarantee over your time there you will meet these 10 individuals.



1. The Hippie – During your time in the dorms, or the hallways you are bound to meet the Hippie. This guy has a beard, a Jamaica beanie (he isn’t Jamaican), and potentially a guitar. He is continually quoting philosophers that he knows limited information on and telling you his vision for the future. Unless you are smoking Marijuana, you will probably be only to handle this guy in small doses.


Brian Cushing

2. The Athlete – Protein, Multi-vitamins, fish oils, no carbs. This guy takes his body seriously, he doesn’t drink because he plays a sport or is trying to get a six pack. Though you will admire his efforts, you find whenever you talk to him he is continually speaking of training and how much he squatted last week. He’s cool, but sometimes you want to have a beer.


3. The One Whose Got Around – You find a hot girl, and for once she is willing to have sex with you! You feel like the luckiest guy in the world until you meet your friends the next morning in the dining hall and find out they also have been the luckiest men in the world with Been around the block Beth. Don’t judge her, just appreciate her.


4. Student Body Supreme – The class president, the head of the poster club, and anything else he/she can handle. This person is probably the busiest person on this list as they are always attending events, giving speeches or hosting parties. They love what they do and you can’t knock it. All you be left doing is wondering how the hell they do school work on top of all the commotion in their life.


5. The Guy Who Has Graduated (Or should have by now) – The name says it all. This guy has his degree, or should have his degree already. He is 26 but still acts like he is in freshmen year. He hangs around campus and campus events even though his time at school is done. When you meet this guy and ask him what his major is, he will probably tell you how is finished already, then you will immediately begin to question his presence at the Monday night dorm mixer.


6.String You Along Sally – Meet Beth’s evil twin…This is the girl that you will meet and begin to pursue. All things will appear to be going smoothly, though she refuses to give you any action. She continually strings you along until after about three months when you finally snap out of it and realize that there are more fish in the sea.


Nerdy Guy

7.The Nerd – He’s great to study with, but horrible to party with. The Nerd spends countless hours at the library mostly due to the constant pressure put on them by their parents to become either a doctor or lawyer. The Nerd’s hard work pays off and most of the time they receive the highest grades, though when you ask them to come out to the semesters end party they decline because they have MCAT practice tests to take three years before graduation.


8. Bar Star – This is the person you meet in College that seems half normal throughout the days, maybe a little tired at times, but overall normal. They invite you out to some club their friend is promoting at, and you gladly accept. After the most alcohol full night of your life, you lay in your bed telling yourself, “I will never drink again,” and that is when you receive the text from the Bar Star asking what you are doing tonight. They have a liver of steel and you don’t. Proceed with caution when entering the Bar Star’s world.


9. High School Hero – This is the guy who can probably “throw a football over them mountains.” He wears his high school Letterman jacket and continually talks about how close his high school team was to a championship. You have never seen him actually get with any women, but he will be the first guy to show his Facebook and go through random pictures of women telling you that he made it happen…He didn’t. You aren’t in high school anymore so distance yourself from the guy who thinks he is.


10. The Awkward Friend – During your time away at school you will make one friend who doesn’t fit the mold of your other friends. For some reason or another you will be friends with this person. You may have shared a class, lived in the same dorm, or randomly got intoxicated together. How you met is history, because now you are friends and you don’t know how it happened or why, but it works.




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